Thursday, August 8, 2013

Yes to God

Today I'm writing for the Proverbs 31 "Yes to God" bible study blog hop. I really wanted to talk about a time I've said yes to God and saw a glimpse of eternity, but I had a hard time deciding which one to blog about. I finally decided on the most difficult one to talk about.

The night my daughter went to Heaven.

On May 28, 2006 at 3:45 in the morning I woke up with a weird feeling. The electricity was out and there was a strange smell. I got up and went in the living room where I saw one little spark. It was where the television cable crossed a potted tree. My first instinct was to put out this spark so I tried to do that, but it blew up and in horror I watched as this spark ran through the cable and zapped my computer on my desk. That's when flames shot up into my curtains and my living room was suddenly ablaze.

I ran back down the hall to wake up my children. My son and daughter had just turned 7. My son met me in the hall and very calmly asked if the house was on fire. I said Yes and told him to get outside. He immediately went down the hall and outside. My daughter was scared and waited with me. I tried to grab a pair of pants from my room, but immediately thought "We don't have time" and turned around, running back down the hall with her. I ran in front of her to open the door so she could run through, but instead the worst happened. She got scared. While I was holding the door, she stopped and took a step back. I couldn't see any of this as it was too dark and smoke had filled the house by then. Her last words to me were "Mommy, I'm scared." I started screaming for her to please run through the door. I knew that I couldn't let go of the open door or we'd be dead, and by this time I had hit my knees screaming for her and trying to reach into the darkness, stretching as far as I could, with only my toe holding that door. I felt her spirit above me in the room and an angelic presence. I "heard" (without actual words) that I only had about 30 seconds to live, and I saw a mental picture of my son sitting outside, scared and waiting for us. I had to say "Yes" to God to leave that house, with my daughter still inside, and even though I knew she was gone it was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

I made it outside, grabbed my son and woke the neighbors. He was able to get back in the house and find her body for me. I will be forever grateful to my neighbor for doing that for me. I was transported by ambulance, and airlifted to the burn unit at Arkansas Children's Hospital in Little Rock. I woke up 5 days later from a coma where I had barely survived. It was a long journey back to health for me.

I want to talk about seeing God in that night. My son was somehow able to go out the front door, where the fire was, and not have a mark on him. He told me that an angel took him out of the house, though he doesn't remember it now. Also, he was sitting outside EXACTLY where I had seen him in my vision. I would give anything to go back and have held Macy's hand, to carry her out of that house. I've dealt with a lot of guilt over not thinking to do that. My only thought was to open the door for her so she could run out.

I've had to hold tightly to Psalm 139:16 You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. This verse has saved my sanity. For reasons beyond my comprehension this was supposed to happen.

An angel saved my son. If God had not been ready to take my daughter home, then he would have saved her too because he was there that night. I miss her so much, every day of my life. I'd give anything to change what happened, but I have to believe in Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. God has a plan for my life and wants to use me in big ways. I also believe he has big plans for my son. That's not the first time he's been saved by an angel! Also, he's still using my daughter to touch people all over. Her presence is still felt in big ways. I know she changed me forever!

So, sometimes saying "Yes" to God is a life or death decision. He wants us to choose life for as long as he has given it. We only have so much time here on earth. It's up to us to make the most of it.


  1. Wow as I read your story it sent chills through me, how horrifying for you but no matter how deep the pain you clung to Jeremiah 29:11. I don't know how I would react in the same situation but hopefully as you did. God truly is using your story and your daughter to touch people all over the world. He was there with you in the lowest moment of your life and is using you to reach others for Him. This spoke loudly to me " So, sometimes saying "Yes" to God is a life or death decision. He wants us to choose life for as long as he has given it. We only have so much time here on earth. It's up to us to make the most of it."
    Blessings and prayers as God continues to use you and your son for His Glory by sharing your glimpse of eternity.
    Marilyn V (OBS Group leader)

  2. What an incredible experience. What we take away from tragedy is hard won. I am glad that God has continued to use your sweet Macy to bless others. Indeed we only have so much time here. We also have so much opportunity. I am glad that we have all joined together for this one. God bless you and your family.

  3. Oh sweet sister...what a testimony for life! I'm so sorry for your loss! As strange as it sounds, you actually comforted me with your words...'An angel saved my son. If God had not been ready to take my daughter home, then he would have saved her too because he was there that night.' How very true. What profound love for our Father in Heaven!! He must be so proud of you! Your sweet Macy will live on through your testimony!
    God Bless you and your family.

  4. Thank you so much for sharing this incredibly difficult story and teaching us that God IS always there, even in terrible tragedy. I can't wait to meet Macy in heaven.

  5. Your faith has encouraged me, I agree that it's so incredible for you to be able to say that an angel saved your son and God was there, it really is beautiful. Thank you for sharing your heart and soul, may God bless you and comfort you and continue to use you to inspire and encourage others.